My Life According To My Playlist

There's this nifty little game Louise put me on to. You take one of those quizzes that make you explain your entire life in a couple dozen questions, and you fill it in. But, instead of giving accurate answers that make things all-too-easy for faux psychics and identity thieves (you may as well just take off the damn tin-foil hat), you play all the songs you have on 'shuffle' and let Windows Media Player answer for you! Or use iTunes - if you SUCK! Here's mine:

1. If someone says "is this okay?" you say...

California Love (Tupac & Dr. Dre). "It's all good from Diego to the Bay!" I actually answer like this quite often ^^

2. How would you describe yourself?

Puke (Eminem). "You don't know how sick you make me/ you make me fucking sick to my stomach/ every time I think of you I puke"? Words cannot express the emo...

3. What do you like in a guy/girl?

Till I Collapse (Eminem, 50 Cent, 2pac). I like a girl with Stamina. Yes, that capital S is intentional.

4. How do you feel today?

We All Die One Day (G-Unit, Eminem, Obie Trice). Today is a good day for contemplating mortality. It can be quite freeing.

5. What is your life's purpose?

Sing for the Moment (Eminem). "Sing it with me/ just for today/ maybe tomorrow the good Lord will take you away..." Friends tell me that doesn't count as a proper ambition. I tell them to STFU before I pop a cap in they ass, yo! :P

6. What is your motto?

Eye of the Tiger (Survivor). SEE! I don't JUST listen to hip-hop. Getting a song like this for the motto question is just stupidly easy. I'm not even going to bother.

7. What do your friends think of you?

For Aragorn and Arwen (Enya). They think I'm the saviour of Middle Earth, come to reclaim my kingdom and vanquish evil. Honestly they do.

8. What do you think of your parents?

Little Becky wants to have her school knocked down (Simon Jones). "Is this a demolition company or a joke factory?" - that pretty much sums it up. :P

9.What do you think about very often?

Random Englishman (the "Microphone" function on my Mp3 player). This is a recording of an awesomely wacky dude I once met on the bus home. You know that type that doesn't quite get how you're never supposed to talk to strangers on public transport? I love that type. Reminds me of me. Quotes like "You're almost an English gentleman, the way you carry on. You're one of the nicest blokes I've ever met on the bus" and "Thank you Jew Itzi. What a nice Jew man you are" are not actually things I think about that often; although perhaps if I did my answer to question 2 would be a little more positive. XD

10. What is 2 + 2?

Busted (Matchbox 20). I wonder how many people actually get a relevant answer to this one?

11. What do you think of your best friend?

Give It Up To Me (Sean Paul). Best friends should always put out. This I believe very strongly.

12. What do you think of the person you like?

Hey Jude (The Beatles). "And dont you know that its just you/ Hey Jude, you'll do" - because Jessica Alba is married and has a kid now.

13. What is your life story?

Stoned (Dido). BWAHAHAHAHHAHAA. Isn't it wonderful when the RNG comes up with this stuff?

14. What do you want to be when you grow up?

Nothing Else Matters (Apocalyptica). When I grow up, I want to achieve a Taoist sense of nihilism. True story.

15. What do you think of when you see the person you like?

When You Are Old and Grey (Tom Lehrer). "Since I still appreciate you, let's find love while we may/ Because I know I'll hate you when you are old and grey." Okay, not HATE... but I might want to keep the light off, you know?

16. What will you dance to at your wedding?

Chemo Limo (Regina Spektor). I think this song is about cancer. I sincerely hope they do not play this at my wedding.

17. What will they play at your funeral?

Wasting Time (Blink 182). I can hear the eulogy now: "We are gathered here today to say goodbye to a man who made nothing of his life." XD

18. What is your hobby/interest?

All Kinds of Time (Fountains of Wayne). "Just like he planned/ The whole world is his tonight." Stupid Fountains of Wayne, blowing my cover. It's a lot harder to achieve world domination when they know you're coming.

19. What is your biggest fear?

Popular (Wicked: The Musical). "Celebrated Heads of State or specially great communicators - did they have brains or knowledge? Don't make me laugh! They were POPULAR!" I wouldn't say this is a fear as such, but this stark truth does irritate me at times. "It's not about aptitude/ It's the way you're viewed/ So it's very shrewd to be/ Very, very popular/ Like me." Heh, I could quote Wicked all day long.

20. What is your biggest secret?

Moon River (Frank Sinatra). "Moon River/ Wider than a mile/ I'm crossing you in style/ Someday." Wow, I can't think of anything funny to say. I'm too busy being seduced by Frank Sinatra. What a voice...

21. What do you think of your friends?

The Great River (Enya). They're all drifters. Get it? Drifters? Like on a raft? Pretty funny, eh? I hate you.

22. Whats a bad habit you have?

What If She's An Angel (Joe Nichols). Occasionally, I make the mistake of not having enough misanthropy. I'm working on it.

23. What do you enjoy of yourself?

No One (Alicia Keys). "No one, no one, no one/ Can get in the way of what I'm feeling." I love the way I can have fun without being worried about making a fool of myself. I feel bad for people who are so terrified of what random strangers might think about them that they won't even sing in public or talk to pretty women. Poor things.

24. What do you think of others?

Michel (Anouk). "You were my first and worst love." That pretty much sums it up. I have this generic love for all people, despite being acutely aware of mankind's tragic failings. Go figure.

25. Boyfriend/Girlfriend?

Take Me Away (Cascada). Europe would be nice...

26. Homework...

Argue (Matchbox Twenty). Classic! Reminds me of a wonderful story from the Talmud - the tale of Rabbi Yochanan and Resh Lakish, Bava Metzia 84a.

Said Rabbi Yochanan, "Whenever I stated an opinion, the son of Lakish used to make twenty-four objections, to which I was compelled to give twenty-four answers; in this way, our understanding of the Law was broadened."

They should give this kind of homework out more often. Kids may actually LEARN something for a change.

Well, that's my quiz done. What a wonderful ride it has been. I encourage you all to go out and complete this quiz yourselves - it's marvelous fun.

Good night, and good luck.

Further Northrend Musings

* Dalaran Fountain Fishing: Jaina Proudmoore is the pin-up girl of kings. Her relationships with Medivh and Uther were supposedly platonic *cough cough*. And her feelings for hunky Thrall - powerful, confident, he-of-the-immaculate-abs Thrall - were supposedly confined to "admiration". But everyone knows about her and Arthas. And according to Kael's coin, he was majorly crushing on the sorceress, too. Honestly, she could have solved all the wars of Azeroth with a little well-placed flirting.

* The Ziggurat Defenders in Borean Tundra make a snazzy Halo tribute. "Noble Hierarchs, surely you understand that once the parasite attacked..." <3

* The quest It Goes to 11... in Howling Fjord was clearly just an attempt by Blizzard to show off their new graphics. I was mildly impressed. Then I did the follow up quest, Let's Go Surfing Now. Wow. Just... wow. You must try it.

* Sharks and dolphins! The way they've done them is INCREDIBLE. The hammerheads of Howling Fjord glide powerfully and elegantly through the surf, mimicking perfectly the movements of real sharks. The melodies murmured by the orcas of Glimmer Bay are chillingly, hauntingly magical...

Get yourself to Outland and swim a little. The greatest rewards often lie just below the surface.

* Once you complete Tools to Get the Job Done for Walt of the Explorers' League, he offers you two new quests: We Can Rebuild It and We Have the Technology. I found that immensely amusing. I would like to pretend I got the reference because of my extensive knowledge of popular culture, but the truth is, they did it on Scrubs.

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Damn, I am loving this "Link" feature. Makes me feel like I'm writing for Encyclopedia Dramatica.

Politics

The really clever people realise that most issues are far too complex to easily form strong and valid opinions on.

The really clever people realise that any input of theirs, through word or deed, would be staggeringly statistically insignificant.

The really clever people would rather spend their limited time, power and cognitive efforts on problems that they can actually solve.


Thus is political governance left to fools.

Northrend Musings

Some random impressions of Northrend before I repose:

* Tuskarr are the sexiest beings known to man. They are heroic and brave and oh-so-cuddly. And they love fishing. <3

* The druids of D.E.H.T.A are unnervingly psychotic. Their struggle to annihilate all who hunt in cruel and unusual ways quickly gets creepy and disturbing. Torture some hunters over here, cut off some ears over there. It's the most chilling thing I've seen in WoW since All That Remains.

* I like how Blizzard has made Nesingwary into a villain for this expansion. Now, I love the little guy. He's pretty much my favourite NPC of all time (Mirren Longbeard and Smiling Jim, you know you still my peeps). But if there's one thing the World of Warcraft portrays spectacularly, it's moral ambiguity. Major props to Blizz for the latest in a long line of feuding factions that make you stop and really think about causes, beliefs, morals, and perspectives. Kudos.

* It's nice to have spirit tap back. I've missed you, old friend.

* Only four levels till Dalaran! Then it's time for me to fish some coins. Salty Dragonyitzi... has a ring to it.

Raise your flippers to the sky!

For those of you who are uninformed and out-of-touch, on account of until recently being held in a PoW camp on a Pacific island by a squadron of Japs who don't know the war's over (it's been over 60 years, fellas; your people are now famed for attaching mops to their shoes), Blizzard Entertainment has just released a new expansion to World of Warcraft.

I went to the midnight launch tonight at EB Games. It was a wonderful, giddying experience; I had ever so much fun mingling with my co-geeks. I got major props for my [T-Shirt of Pure Pwnage], I made fun of blood elves, and together we all bitched about why Blizzard is the worst games company in the world and how every single thing about WoW is unbalanced and stupid.

The single most memorable event of the night occurred while the security guard was explaining to the attentive masses what they should do when their tickets are called. He was speaking pretty softly, which gave me a wonderful opportunity to interject. I cupped my hands around my mouth and yelled in a booming voice which carried wonderfully in the silent, empty mall: "EVERYONE! MURLOC NOISES ON THREE! ONE-TWO-THREE! RGGGRLLRRRGRGLRL!"

Not unsurprisingly, no-one else joined in. There was a moment that I will remember forever, when, with the entire WoW community of the Eastern Suburbs watching raptly, I cried the gargley cry of a Murloc. It was one of the moments that seemed to go on forever, those dazzling singularities of time. In reality, it was probably only half a second before the sheer absurdity of it all breached my wall of bravado and I broke down in hysterics.

Everyone joined in.

It. Was. Wonderful.